Yes, I know. 2016. What a shit. So many celebrity deaths so far.
You may be tempted, as are many others, to dismiss people
posting their own emotional response to the death of somebody they hardly knew
as attention grabbing bollocks and you know what? In most cases I believe you
would be right to do it.
BUT, we Brits live in a fucked up society in many ways and
one of those ways is that do not discuss, encourage or even admit the existence
of grief. We have become a society that allows “a couple of weeks off work” for
the loss of someone very, very dear to you. It’s a sort of emotional sickness
and I’m not sure what we can really do about it.
Here’s the thing about celebrity deaths, though – it is one
of the only ways that the media is comfortable in encouraging the grieving
process. It is exploitative and often intrusive but it is a way of sharing the
experience with others.
I have seen very often people who say they are having
trouble stopping grieving a particular loss only for it to have triggered the sensation
of a previous – perhaps more profound – loss. Someone can very easily slip into
denial over the loss of a family member, friend or partner only to find the
later experience (maybe years later) of losing a distant relative or a pet or a
celebrity deeply and genuinely affecting.
I’m not suggesting that every attention seeking post on
social media is “worthy of your sympathy” because that’s not true and sympathy
wouldn’t help them if it were. I would like to suggest, however, that there
will be some – possibly several in your group of Facebook friends – who actually
are working through something and those few should hopefully convince you to
offer some empathy across the board.
Taking the piss a bit out of a grief-junkie can be funny and
I can also see that somebody’s indulgent behaviour about celebrity death might
be upsetting you about your own suppressed grief but … and this is very
important … please keep it civil and respectful.
I can see 2016 getting worse as a number of factors combine
to change the way we look at life, death and fame. There will probably be more
celebrity deaths, and if so there will certainly be more whining and
showboating from arseholes but alongside that there will be people using these deaths
as a way to mourn their own losses.
I mean, you don’t have to listen to me. Do what you need to.
It’s just, if some weird behaviour happens, this could explain it. I hope it
helps.
Thanks for reading.
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